tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61413738011017948832024-03-13T10:34:08.693-06:00Little House in the CityMy little blog about growing little people, and a little food, in the city.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.comBlogger61125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-13263910340129081852013-04-22T22:24:00.000-06:002013-04-22T22:24:22.271-06:00Gluten Free/Casein Free Experiment Day 3 (And a paleo meatball recipe!)So far we haven't had any complaints about our change in diet. I made sure to fully stock the house with favorite "safe" foods so no one would feel deprived, and it seems to be working.<br />
<br />
Some of the behaviors I'm noticing that I'm hoping will go away. Henry's shirt chewing has increased again this week as has his back talking, neediness/clinginess, and fixation on Minecraft. Thomas was particularly fussy today. We have compounding factors with Thomas - in addition to the diet change we're also night weaning.<br />
<br />
On a related note, I slept through the night last night for the first time in over two years! Woo hoo!<br />
<b><br /></b>
So here's what the kids ate today.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Breakfast</b><br />
Sausage, strawberries, dry chocolate chex cereal.<br />
Once again, Helen ate everything. The boys just ate the sausage.<br />
<br />
<b>Lunch</b><br />
Grazing on ham and fruit.<br />
Mini Egg Pizzas from Eat Like a Dinosaur.<br />
Helen (it's so nice to have a good eater in the house!) gobbled them up, the boys wouldn't even taste them. Which is too bad, because they really did taste like pizza and even had a pizza like texture. I will probably make them again and hope the boys will give them a try.<br />
<br />
<b>Snack</b><br />
Peanut butter Chocolate Apple "Cookies"<br />
These were great. Cut apples length wise so you have apple circles. (I know I should have pictures, but really anyway you slice the apple is fine.) Spread with peanut butter (or seed/nut butter of your choice). Top with "safe" chocolate chips. This felt like a huge treat!<br />
<br />
<b>Dinner</b><br />
Paleo Meatballs and pasta sauce<br />
Quinoa pasta shells<br />
<br />
Dinner was a huge hit with everyone. I'm so glad I made a huge batch of meatballs! I cooked half of them with marinara sauce for dinner and the other half I cooked in some chicken broth and froze for future meals. Here's the recipe:<br />
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<b><i>Paleo and Kid Friendly Meatballs</i></b><br />
<b><br /></b>
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1 cup almond meal</div>
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1/4 cup coconut flour</div>
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1 tsp garlic powder</div>
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1 tsp salt </div>
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6 oz tomato paste</div>
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3 eggs</div>
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1 lb ground chicken</div>
1 lb ground beef<br />
1 lb ground pork<br />
oil for frying<br />
marinara sauce or chicken broth<br />
<br />
Mix almond meal, coconut flour, garlic powder and salt. I used my stand mixer to mix everything up. Add tomato paste and eggs and mix well. Add meat and mix till everything is well combined.<br />
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Heat oil in a large pan until it sizzles when you drop something in it. Form meatballs to desired size. I used a one inch cookie scoop. Brown meatballs for a minute or so on each side and then transfer them to your marinara sauce or chicken broth. Simmer for 30 minutes or more until they're cooked through. For our marinara sauce I used a jar of my dad's homemade sauce, a jar of store sauce and about a cup of white wine. Is wine paleo? I don't know or care. :)<br />
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The meatballs were awesome. They held together well and were delicious. Even with the big eaters gobbling them up, this made enough for at least two meals. I'm sending a few of the sauceless ones in Henry's lunch tomorrow.<br />
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<b><br /></b>Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-63165158176792730442013-04-22T22:18:00.000-06:002013-04-22T22:18:19.699-06:00Gluten Free/Casein Free Experiment: Day 2Helen asked loudly at breakfast this morning, "Don't you just love this diet?!! We get to eat scrambled eggs and bacon and fruit!" The boys weren't as enthusiastic. They left their tacos untouched.<br />
<br />
<b>Breakfast</b><br />
Scrambled eggs in corn tortillas with salsa<br />
bacon<br />
watermelon<br />
<br />
<b>Snack</b><br />
Chocolate Chex<br />
<br />
<b>Lunch</b><br />
Helen ate leftover meatloaf<br />
I think Henry ate ham.<br />
I don't know what Thomas ate. He may have just had mama's milk before his nap.<br />
<br />
Sunday lunches are mostly grazing affairs around here. Fruit and nuts. Not sure what else they ate. Oh. Potato chips. :)<br />
<br />
<b>Dinner</b><br />
Roasted chicken<br />
mashed potatoes with unsweetened almond milk and Earth's best soy free butter spread<br />
roasted brussel sprouts<br />
Almond dream vanilla ice cream for dessert<br />
<br />
<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-5051724052039822752013-04-20T18:21:00.002-06:002013-04-20T18:21:50.638-06:00Gluten Free/Casein Free Experiment: Day 1We've decided to jump on the GF/CF bandwagon and see if we notice any discernible positive change from the diet. I'm hoping mostly for positive behavioral changes. I have some indication that my boys are addicted to wheat and dairy - they have very limited diets composed primarily of milk and bread. My oldest in particular. My pediatrician doesn't seem too concerned that Henry lives on hamburgers, milk, and apples ("it covers all 4 food groups!"), but I actually believe nutrition is important. I've heard that once you get through the initial withdrawl, these picky eaters often expand their repertoire quite a bit.<br />
<br />
So not only do we have GF/CF challenge, we have a very picky eater challenge. I've planned out a full week of meals and snacks based on Henry's favorite foods that are naturally (or with minor tweaking) GF/CF. I don't want to do a bunch of highly processed gluten free foods. But I don't want them to feel deprived either, so I'm allowing more "junk" than I might normally (i.e. potato chips, dairy free ice cream, etc.).<br />
<br />
Ideally I will keep a record here of how my family receives these meals and whether I notice any changes in behaviors.<br />
<br />
So today we ate:<br />
<br />
<b>Breakfast</b><br />
Henry just ate sausage. The other kids also had hashbrowns with mustard.<br />
<br />
<b>Lunch</b><br />
Okay, this is sad, but they just jumped me when I got in from the grocery store and ate what looked good. It was past lunch time, so I just let it go.<br />
Chocolate Chex Cereal with soy milk<br />
Potato Chips<br />
Pepperoni<br />
Ham<br />
<br />
<b>Dinner</b><br />
Meatloaf (with almond flour and coconut flour in place of bread crumbs)<br />
Sweet potato fries<br />
GF Ketchup (is all ketchup GF? I don't know, but I bought some marked GF just to make sure.)<br />
Steamed broccoli<br />
Orange Juice (calcium fortified)<br />
<br />
<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-66766055376635770172013-03-03T14:14:00.002-07:002013-03-03T14:14:27.986-07:00Accountable Kids PreviewI wrote this a couple of weeks ago and forgot to publish it. We're into the Accountable Kids system a good ways now, but I won't spoil the outcome. Here's how I was feeling before we started:<br />
<br />
<br />
A few weeks ago I mentioned that I am seeking more discipline in our family life. Because I am a little weak in the self-discipline department, and because, as I mentioned, I hate being a disciplinarian, I decided to seek a little outside help.<br />
<br />
This is completely out of character for me. First of all, my educational background is in managing challenging behavior in children. I should know how to figure this out on my own. Secondly, I HATE spending money on things that I feel like I could do myself. Finally, I am a total do-it-yourselfer not only for money reasons but because I can't accept anything off the shelf. It's why I homeschool. Why I don't use curriculum. Why I make my own cleaning products. I like to have things my way.<br />
<br />
So that gives you an idea of how desperate I must have been feeling when I Paypal-ed $95 to Accountable Kids for an out-of-the-box "chore" system.<br />
<br />
I chose this particular system primarily because my best friend has been using it with her kid for a couple of years now and it works well for her family.<br />
<br />
The basic set up is this. A child has a set of chores that he has to complete at set times during the day (morning chores, afternoon chores, evening chores). These "chores" are often simply self care tasks such as brushing one's teeth or getting dressed. Once a child has completed those chores, he receives a "ticket." These tickets can then be exchanged for privileges such as screen time, play dates, a new book, or whatever motivates that particular child. A child can lose a ticket for bad behavior. A child can also do extra chores to earn money, but must first complete his regular chores.<br />
<br />
This all comes with a slick little peg board for hanging the various elements on.<br />
<br />
I wanted to write a little preview of my hopes and dreams for what this system will accomplish for our family so that I can honestly assess how it's working for us later.<br />
<br />
So here are some problem spots I hope will be smoothed out:<br />
<br />
<b>Morning Routine/TV Time</b><br />
As it stands now, my kids wake up and trickle downstairs to watch TV while I have a little quiet time and make breakfast. I take their breakfast orders while they watch TV, and lately, they eat breakfast while watching TV. Then, we fight about turning off the TV and getting dressed so we can get out the door to wherever we need to be that day. We leave 10 to 15 minutes late with me furious at everyone. It's fun. You should try it.<br />
<br />
What's <i>supposed </i>to happen is that the kids get up, watch TV until breakfast and then turn it off while we all eat together. Then they can go back to the TV once they are fully dressed and have everything ready to walk out the door.<br />
<br />
My <i>ideal</i> situation is that everyone find a different way to wake up in the morning before breakfast (playing with dolls? reading a book?). I would be ecstatic if my kids actually helped me get breakfast on the table or even (gasp!) got their own breakfast. I'd love to have some short family prayers or devotional time before we head off for our daily activities.<br />
<br />
For now, I'll settle for what's supposed to happen, but I want to keep my ideal in mind as a goal.<br />
<br />
<b>Bed Time</b><br />
This goes fairly smoothly for 2/3 children. I'd love to have some leverage with the other one.<br />
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<b>Back Talking, Attitude, Imperious Demands</b><br />
We're currently working on this with time outs. I was never a huge stickler requiring one to say "please", but things have gotten way out of hand. I am tired of being held hostage by a little tyrant who will make my life hell if I do not do exactly what I'm commanded to do the second I am commanded to do it. I tried modeling the behavior I want to see, responding kindly despite the rudeness, trying to help and indulge as much as I could, but it has only made things worse. I would indulge and indulge until finally I would snap.<br />
<br />
I think this will be behavior I take a ticket for. Deliberate pig-headedness - i.e. refusing to get dressed when it's time to leave the house, or ordering mommy to fetch your shoes because you don't feel like doing it yourself, or screaming at mommy because she didn't get your dolls clothes on just right? Yeah. I'm taking your ticket.<br />
<br />
So I'm thinking at the beginning my kids, at least one of them, won't have a whole lot of privileges. I'm trying to come up with things that won't require tickets - things that I wish we were doing more of anyway. Things like reading books with mommy, or going for a walk, or playing quietly in your room.<br />
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It will be interesting to see how this all plays out. I'm nervous.<br />
<br />
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<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-8231149157528806102013-02-26T14:24:00.000-07:002013-02-26T16:29:45.895-07:00Encouraging Creativity"Hey, mom! Want to color in Cutielicious?"<br />
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<br />
Yes, I do. I love Cutielicious. It's a super fun doodle book with just enough structure for the creatively challenged (me) and more than enough freedom for the artistically inclined (Helen). One of the best purchases I've ever made, it makes me happy to color in this ultra cute book with my little girl.<br />
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Usually.<br />
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"Ooooh! Let's color the cookie page," my little one exclaims. "Which cookie do you want to do?"<br />
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I select my cookie declaring, "I'm going to color it like one of the yummy sugar cookies with the slick pink frosting on it. I love those. I'll try a pink circle in the middle and then color around it with tan."*<br />
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"No. You have to color it all brown first."<br />
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"I don't want to color it all brown first, then it won't look like I want it to."<br />
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"But I want you to make it look like this one," my little girl asserts, pointing to the sample cookie provided.<br />
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Um. That's an ugly cookie. I don't like the way it looks. I wanted to color it like the delicious cookie in my brain.<br />
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"Why can't I color my cookie the way I want to color my cookie?" I ask a little petulantly.<br />
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"Because I want it to look like this one!"<br />
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"Then you can color yours like that one. I want to make mine a pink sugar cookie." I'm a little surprised at how strongly I feel about this and how grumpy I am to have my small opportunity for creativity wrestled from me by my tyrannical daughter insisting I recreate the uninspired cookie offered as a model.<br />
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At her further insistence I copy this stupid cookie, while she criticizes my efforts.<br />
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"Those circles aren't round enough!"<br />
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"That's the wrong color."<br />
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I take a deep breath and remind myself that I am a grown up, that the activity in front of me is not about my artistic (ha!) expression but about connecting and sharing time with my precious daughter. So I copied the ugly cookie.*<br />
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And then I thought about how often we suck the joy out of our children by asking them to copy the ugly cookie.<br />
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It may go something like this.<br />
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"Hey mom! Can I help you clean the bathroom?" a child asks enthusiastically while grabbing the spray bottle of homemade non-toxic cleaner.<br />
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"Sure! Here, spray right here. . .wait, no, that's too much! No, don't spray there, here, that's enough. Okay now. Wait! Where are you going? I thought you wanted to help me!"<br />
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Or maybe this is more familiar.<br />
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"Mom! Look! I wrote a poem! Want to read it?"<br />
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"Sure! . . . Oh, you misspelled this word. You should put a comma here. Do you think it would be better if you. . . "<br />
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Or sometimes around here it's:<br />
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"Mom! Can I make a cake?"<br />
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"Sure, first you need to . . . okay now . . . wait, let me just . . . good now . . . wait! I thought you were going to make a cake!"<br />
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The resentment I felt at being forced to copy that ugly cookie, the disappointment at having my joy and vision subjugated to someone else's agenda, made me realize just how damaging it is to interrupt a child's inspiration. Not only does it prevent their expressing their creativity, but it robs them of the motivation to act in any way. I copied that ugly cookie, but I didn't want to and I hated every minute of it. And when I was finally allowed to create my own cookie, the joy was gone.<br />
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I'm pretty sure that had I had the freedom to create my own cookie first, I would have happily copied that ugly cookie to please my little girl. Of course, I'm a grown up. I can get over it. But every time we ask a child to copy the ugly cookie before they're allowed to create the cookie that inspires their joy, we rob them of the opportunity to express their unique vision. We deny them the satisfaction that comes from acting on their internal motivation to create something that pleases them. Ultimately, we prevent them from learning to be self-motivated individuals who can conceive of an idea and follow through on it's implementation without always having someone else tell them what to do and how to do it.<br />
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I'm going to try to cultivate an awareness for when I'm asking my children to copy an ugly cookie. I'd much rather see the beautiful pink-frosted sugar cookies lurking in their brains.<br />
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~~~~~<br />
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* I would like to say for the record that I can see that the "ugly cookie" I created under my daughter's direction is, in fact, much cooler than the pink sugar cookie of my imagination. But that's hardly the point now, is it?Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-78694719331016585562013-02-08T22:20:00.000-07:002013-02-08T22:20:51.730-07:00Seeking DisciplineMy friend <a href="http://homeschoolmindgarden.blogspot.com/">Clea </a>shared this on facebook the other day. I quote it here, with her permission, because it so perfectly captures where I'm at myself.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px;">So I think I've named the crux of my challenge here at my little homeschool. My kids think "homeschooling" equals "do whatever I want" and when that isn't the case, whether we're talking chores, errands, academic work, or speaking to me, they turn very unpleasant very fast. So my job isn't so much to teach them academic whatever, or even "how to learn" but a) self regulation and restraint and b) how to not be a brat when you don't get your way. Right now that job description isn't working for me.</span></blockquote>
We are in the thick of it here these days. The toddler is finding his two-year-old voice. The brand new five-year-old is taking "strong willed" to new heights, and my 7-year-old, while mostly "good" can display some amazing attitude when asked to do something as simple as clear his plate from the table. Add in the usual sibling spats and the tiny daily stresses that is simply life with three small children (you know, sleepless nights, ear infections, tummy bugs, and <i>seriously </i>do I really have to feed you all again???) and I'm just feeling, well, challenged I guess is the best word for it.<br />
<br />
Feeling challenged is an improvement. I was feeling utter despair. An afternoon to myself spent shopping, reading and praying helped turn me around a bit. So I've moved past despair, but I'm still a long way from joyful.<br />
<br />
I am very clear that self regulation and restraint and how-to-not-be-a-brat-when-you-don't-get-your-way are at the top of what I'm supposed to be teaching my kids these days. Perhaps just a tiny bit behind not-bullying-everyone-in-the-house-with-your-unreasonable-and-impossible-demands-and-your-temper-tantrums. And I have started these lessons with a renewed energy.<br />
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And I hate it. I hate being the bad guy, the heavy, the "worst mom in the world." I do know moms who revel in these labels. They hear these epithets as assurance that they are doing a good job. Not me.<br />
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Somewhere along the line I fell for the story that if you just love your kids enough, if you reason with them, let them know you're always on their side, breastfeed them until they're 20, sleep with them, wear them, and do everything "right," you will have an endlessly happy relationship with your child.<br />
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Let me tell you something. I know a lot of people who have done the attachment parenting/gentle discipline thing, and not one of them is having an easy, blissful time with their child. Neither are my friends who took a more conventional route.<br />
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Because this parenting thing is hard. It presents new challenges every. single. day. Because children (like adults) are prone to selfishness, impulsiveness, irrationality, and a deep inner distaste for being told what to do.<br />
<br />
And it is my job to tell them what to do. Even as I write that I'm arguing with the voices in my head who say that's not really necessarily the case. But it is. Because if I don't teach them to bathe themselves, to treat others with kindness and respect, to clean up after themselves, to feed themselves, etc., etc., etc., then they will be people who cannot take care of themselves and whom no one wants to be around. And that does not serve them well.<br />
<br />
So I am embarking on a stricter discipline regimen. Which means I am no longer tolerating the wicked back talk ("aaaarrrhhh! I don't want to! You're mean!") or the imperious demands ("You get my shoes and carry them to the car for me!") or the refusal to comply with the fundamentals of self care (say, brushing one's teeth).<br />
<br />
It's exhausting. The ups and downs. The screaming tantrums followed by the giggling snuggles followed by imperious announcement of how many pieces of birthday cake I will or won't be permitted at my darling's next birthday party.<br />
<br />
I'm worn out. I have to constantly remind myself that being a "good mom" doesn't mean my kids are always happy. And yet, I really did believe that if I just did it all "right," my kids would be charming, agreeable little people at all times.<br />
<br />
That's when I have to remind myself that Our Heavenly Father, in all his goodness and perfection, does not have children who are always charming and agreeable. Heaven knows I'm not. A<br />
<br />
So I'm charging forward. And I'm seeing some benefits. It's kind of two steps forward, one step back, but it's progress. I feel like there are more good moments now than there were a week ago. And less yelling from all of us.<br />
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We still have a lot of work to do, but I think we're moving in the right direction.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-66074699590015631802012-12-16T14:33:00.000-07:002012-12-16T14:33:08.161-07:00You are precious<div>
I find Facebook is a nice representation of the cultural zeitgeist. I find it reflects the shortness of the American attention span and the ease with which we can be turned from focusing on those issues we passionately embrace one moment and then cast aside when the next shiny object is dangled in front of us.</div>
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On Friday, July 20, 2012, a gunman opened fire in a movie theater and killed 12 people. Fifty-eight others were injured. The next day, Facebook was shocked and horrified, deeply saddened, and, once the obligatory condolences were offered, alive with rallying cries to stop the horror. "Gun control!" "2nd Amendment Rights!" "When will the madness end?" "Don't Tread on Me!" Lots of noise, lots of emotion, but virtually zero conversation.</div>
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Then, not two weeks after this unspeakable horror was visited on our community, something interesting happened. A private business owner expressed his unpopular opinion about gay marriage. Suddenly, the whole world, or at least all of Facebook, had forgotten the horror of the Aurora killings. Now Facebook erupted with rainbow flags and shouts about the 1st amendment and love versus hate. Half my feed was planning to eat crappy chicken sandwiches on Wednesday, August 1 and the other half was trying to drum up a same-sex friend to make out with them outside of a fast food restaurant two days later. </div>
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But I'll hand it to Facebook. The gay marriage issue did remain in my feed for the next several months. It was joined by heated sloganeering about women's health "rights."Because if there's anything more important than keeping our children from being slaughtered in movie theaters, it's making sure that everyone has access to free birth control. </div>
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Not once during the campaigning leading up to the election did I hear anyone raise the issue of gun control. Not once did I hear anyone demanding to know how the candidates were going to address the issue of crazed gunmen mowing down our children in schools. </div>
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The irony here is that it seems like this is an issue that people <i>should</i> be able to agree on. At least to an extent. While people may never come to an agreement as to whether or not we want to provide free birth control for all, it seems that we should at least be able to agree that we don't want people murdering people en masse in public places. </div>
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After Aurora, people cried, "How many more are going to have to die before we do something about this?" The answer, apparently, is "at least 26 more." </div>
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In the face of this most recent school shooting, I find my Facebook page is once again alive with gun control "debates." I place debates in quotes because the reality is there is no debate. There is no discussion. There is wild emotionalism on both sides with no one listening to anyone with an opinion that differs from his own. There are a few speaking reasonably, but I fear no one is listening. True, mind changing dialogue rarely occurs on Facebook. <div>
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Which is fine. I'm not asking anyone to give up whatever it is they get out of participating in these "discussions." What I am asking is that you stop pretending it's some sort of meaningful activism. If you want to effect change, do so. Stop talking at people who aren't listening. Stop collecting "likes" from people who already agree with you, and find out who you need to talk to in order to make change. </div>
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My plea to all, whether you're shouting "Gun Control!" or "Right to Keep and Bear Arms!", is to put your energy to work where it will actually make a difference. Don't squander it by engaging in exhausting exchanges that have no power to effect change. </div>
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You're time and energy are too precious. You are too precious. </div>
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Which brings me to my final point. Until each and everyone of us realizes that each and every one of us is too precious, we will not see an end to senseless displays of violence. Hateful words on Facebook are born of the same malice that opens fire on school children. </div>
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"You have heard that it was said to them of old: Thou shalt not kill. And whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment. But I say to you, that whosoever is angry with his brother, shall be in danger of the judgment. And whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council. And whosoever shall say, Thou Fool, shall be in danger of hell fire." (Matthew 5:21-22)</div>
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However you choose to respond to this deep sickness in our culture, whether you choose to lobby for gun control or fund mental health research or to fast and pray, remember that every single person you encounter is infinitely precious. That includes you. Until we can begin to see the tiniest glimmer of worth in ourselves and in each other, the tiniest reflection of the value and dignity that Our Father sees in us, until we can begin to see that each life truly is sacred and worthy of our love and protection and <i>reverence</i>, nothing will change. </div>
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Though it's quoted often enough to be cliche, you must go forth and be the change you wish to see in the world. Change doesn't happen "out there." It happens in every interaction you have with another human being. Make sure your interactions reflect the love you want to see in the world. </div>
Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-4725398783350133462012-12-14T21:22:00.000-07:002012-12-14T21:22:29.810-07:00In the face of tragedyAnother senseless tragedy in our country has everyone reeling again. I don't consume news media. All of my information comes from Facebook. Maybe that's pathetic, but I manage to hear about most things anyway.<br />
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I don't need to know the details. The outline is horrific enough.<br />
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What I don't understand is the shock and disbelief evident in so many reactions to this tragedy. Terrible, horrible, sickening, unthinkable things happen in this world every day. Every single day. And they have happened every single day from the beginning of human beings. This is not news. Every single day some horrible monster does something terrible to an innocent child somewhere. Every single day people are murdered. We only hear about the big ones. And not even all the big ones, but just the big ones that happen in our own back yard.<br />
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I suppose I should find it heartening that people are still surprised when news like this breaks. I don't consider myself particularly jaded or despairing, but I am aware that this beautiful life, and the unspeakably precious gift of my children, could be taken from me at any moment in any one of an infinite number of terrible ways. But I try not to let it keep me up at night. Most nights I succeed. When I feel scared, when I the fear of losing my family grips my throat and knots my stomach, I thank God for all that I've been given that I do not deserve. One smile from one of my sweet children is more joy than I could dare to hope to experience in this life. I have so very much to be grateful for.<br />
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And speaking of God. Everyone wants to know how God could allow such evil to exist. But evil doesn't exist. Evil is nothing. Just like darkness does not exist, but is merely the absence of light. As cold does not exist, but is merely the absence of heat. Evil is the absence of good. The Good. If you want to rid the world of evil you have to flood it with Good.<br />
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And you have to do it every single day. Not just when news of tragedy reaches you. Not just when the big ones are staring you in the face. You have to do good when your child wants your attention while you're surfing facebook. You have to do good when that jackass cuts you off in traffic. You have to do good when you're in a hurry at the grocery store.<br />
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We aren't helpless. But it's not easy either. Now is not the time for hand wringing. Nor is it the time for taking up arms. Now is the time for Love. Every single day. With every single person you encounter. How different this world would be if we all remembered this all the time.<br />
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<span class="userContent"><i>"You say, the times are troublesome, the times
are burdensome, the times are miserable. Live rightly and you will
change the times.<br /><br /> The times have never hurt anyone. Those who
are hurt are human beings; those by whom they are hurt are also human
beings. So, change human beings and the times will be changed." </i> <br /> -Saint Augustine, Sermon 311, 8</span>Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-78396402750107217532012-11-06T22:30:00.001-07:002012-11-06T22:30:09.879-07:00DIY Wall Timeline TutorialA long while back I <a href="http://mylittlehouseinthecity.blogspot.com/2011/08/dreaming-of-timelines.html">wrote</a> about wanting to create some sort of masterpiece of a timeline to hang on my dining room wall. I promised to update with pictures when I'd done so, but I just didn't. The conversation has come up recently in a number of homeschooling circles, so I am finally sharing my finished product with some pictures and helpful hints.<br />
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Without further ado, I give you our timeline:<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bU_5ngWH1GQ/UJnhTrsiyJI/AAAAAAAAASM/V9gns5Bg2WI/s1600/DSC02978.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bU_5ngWH1GQ/UJnhTrsiyJI/AAAAAAAAASM/V9gns5Bg2WI/s640/DSC02978.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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Do you see the size of that bad boy? It's 5 feet long and 3ft 4inches tall. It dominates the room and is, sadly, the most attractive thing in the room. Aside from maybe the pink Christmas tree. Which was a Halloween tree and will become a "Saint Tree" and then a Jesse Tree before heading upstairs to do it's job as a Christmas tree in the kids' room when the time comes. But I digress.</div>
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I'm a bit proud of my timeline. It's not a great work of art, but it is much more attractive than many of the timelines I've seen. And in fact, it's much more attractive than the first one I attempted: </div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tA9xYSnoP5A/UJnn4NxGJHI/AAAAAAAAASw/Uxm4lHs_-Bo/s1600/DSCN4330.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tA9xYSnoP5A/UJnn4NxGJHI/AAAAAAAAASw/Uxm4lHs_-Bo/s640/DSCN4330.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Here's a bad picture of my ugly timeline.</td></tr>
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Now, as I mentioned in my first post on the subject, I've accepted that my house will scream "we homeschool," but I still just couldn't bare looking at that every night at dinner. So I went back to the drawing board. I think I wandered aimless around Dollar Tree looking for inspiration when I was struck with the idea of using ribbon. I didn't find any suitable ribbon at Dollar Tree and ended up at Michael's. </div>
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I wandered around Michael's looking for any sort of round sticker to use for the year markers. I was shocked that I was completely unable to find appropriately sized round stickers. But I saw those giant hole punch things and realized that it was actually cheaper to invest in one of those and make my own "stickers" out of craft paper and glue. And I got a new toy out of the deal. </div>
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If you want to make a timeline like this one, here's what you need.</div>
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<ul>
<li>4 sheets of foam board, 30in X 20in (I got mine at the Dollar Tree)</li>
<li>Duct Tape</li>
<li>Contact paper in a pattern you don't hate - enough to cover the foam board. I also got this at the Dollar Tree.</li>
<li>40 feet of narrow ribbon</li>
<li>a craft punch in a shape you like</li>
<li>a ruler</li>
<li>a sharpie</li>
<li>glue - you're going to have to buy good glue designed to glue ribbon. I used something called Embellishment Glue in stick form. I tried using school glue and a glue gun and both were a disaster. Invest in the glue. Trust me.</li>
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The first step is to tape the 4 sheets of foam board together using Duct Tape. Then flip the whole huge board over and cover it with contact paper. It helps to have help with this step unless you're the kind of person who likes to be alone when you're frustrated and trying to wrestle giant sheets of sticky paper.<br />
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The next step was the hardest for me, but I've done the hard work (the math) for you, so just follow my lead. Lay out 8 rows of the ribbon. You can be anal and measure to evenly space it, or you can just wing it like I did. I intentionally crowded it toward the top where I figure we'll have fewer dates to add and spaced it further toward the bottom where I figure we'll have more to add. </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-P6YOb4lRPfw/UJngcWvj5oI/AAAAAAAAARo/589eCnsR62E/s1600/DSC02965.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-P6YOb4lRPfw/UJngcWvj5oI/AAAAAAAAARo/589eCnsR62E/s640/DSC02965.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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The next hardest part is getting the rows straight. Once I decided where I wanted the ribbon, I marked it on one side, measured it's distance from the top and then measured that out on the other side and laid it across. I tried all kinds of crazy things to get the ribbon straight. I hung a string from a weight and tried to get gravity to help me get it straight. . . You just have to decide how crazy you want to be about it.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-m0bcUZi7B1A/UJnof7RlKcI/AAAAAAAAATk/z_Kd_0qr2pk/s1600/DSCN4400.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-m0bcUZi7B1A/UJnof7RlKcI/AAAAAAAAATk/z_Kd_0qr2pk/s640/DSCN4400.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">See the black line? That's there's one in the same place on the other side. That's how I got the ribbon straight.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Z_ot_VenX84/UJnorKn-NiI/AAAAAAAAATw/m5_wo51gHE0/s1600/DSCN4401.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Z_ot_VenX84/UJnorKn-NiI/AAAAAAAAATw/m5_wo51gHE0/s640/DSCN4401.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The glue I used. This worked great and wasn't messy.</td></tr>
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Once you've got the ribbon on, the hard part is over. The rest is just tedious.<br />
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Take your punch and punch out approximately 18,000 punches.<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Nkq8T1F_OMg/UJnn1WP65yI/AAAAAAAAASg/pizA8yreLW0/s1600/DSCN4394.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Nkq8T1F_OMg/UJnn1WP65yI/AAAAAAAAASg/pizA8yreLW0/s320/DSCN4394.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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Now you're going to write years on them as so:<br />
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<ul>
<li>For the years 5000 BC to 2000 BC, write every 200 years (5000, 4800, 4600, etc.)</li>
<li>For the years 2000 BC to year 0, write every 100 years (2000, 1900, 1800, etc.)</li>
<li>For the years 0 - 1600 AD, write every 100 years</li>
<li>For the years 1600 - 1850, write every 25 years</li>
<li>For the years 1850 - 2020 write every 10 years</li>
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A side note for the anal retentive (like me): No, this doesn't give a totally accurate depiction of the passage of time. However. You want this to fit on your wall. And you want room for all of the big events that happened in modern history without leaving huge chunks empty in the ancient past. This is also why I spaced the rows further apart as I moved down the timeline. You're free to arrange your years anyway you want, but then you'll have to do your own math.<br />
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I went up through the year 2020 because I want to add stuff to this as we go forward, and I plan to leave it up forever.<br />
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Okay, now you're ready to stick all of these on. Use the same glue as before and, starting with 2020 and working backwards, space as follows:<br />
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<li>2020 to the year 0, one marker every 8 inches (measure from the middle of one to the middle of the other)</li>
<li>year 0 to 5000 BC, one marker every 3 inches</li>
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There. Now you're done. Stand back and admire your handiwork!<br />
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Since I'm really committed to this timeline, I stuck it to my wall using that double sided foam tape stuff. It's not going anywhere. In fact, I want to paint the room and I think I'm just going to paint around it. I'm afraid I can't get it down without destroying it.<br />
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All you have to do now is add the history. I made a template in Pages where I can just drag and drop images from Google Images into the template and then print, cut and laminate. I happen to have scored a laminator at Goodwill on half price day for a grand total of $4.50. So I get to laminate. But you can use packing tape if you're not as lucky in your thrifting as I am.<br />
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One of the reasons I wanted to make my own timeline is because I wanted to decide what goes on it. I wanted to be able to add important family events.<br />
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We also add the historical novels we read.<br />
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And whatever else we happen to take a fancy in.<br />
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We've had our timeline up for more than a year now, and it's not as fleshed out as I had hoped, but that is due at least in part to the fact that I seem to always be missing either printer ink, double stick tape, or laminate/packing tape. So I guess that's one drawback of doing it yourself. Another is that it is a pretty big project, but hopefully the mistakes I made will make your efforts easier. I really am proud of this. And it really is a great conversation starter - both for family dinners and for anyone who comes to our home. I had high hopes when I made it, and I think, so far, it's delivering what I'd hoped it would.<br />
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<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-88464583457325170532012-06-24T12:58:00.003-06:002012-12-14T21:23:03.630-07:00Monster Quest: Search for Big FootHenry has been deeply immersed in two different "unit studies" of his own design and choosing. One is a study of ancient Egypt, which I'll blog about in another post. The other is a unit on crypto zoology, specifically the search for Big Foot.<br />
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I'm not sure what sparked his interest in this topic, but as a result my husband hunted down a couple of shows to stream on Netflix. Monster Quest and Is It Real both examine evidence for the existence of such terrifying and mysterious creatures as Sasquatch, the Loch Ness Monster and the Chupacabra.<br />
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I am astonished by the amount of learning that has come out of watching these shows. Henry has expanded his knowledge of folklore, geography (marking the states on a map where there have been Big Foot sitings), and the scientific method. In the process he's also done a good bit of practice drawing and writing.<br />
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He researched on YouTube to find a video showing the process for creating a plaster cast of animal tracks. He practiced measuring and mixing and multiplication to create enough plaster to pour into the print he discovered.<br />
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Some non-standard unit measurement for the preschooler.<br />
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Working to get the cast out.<br />
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This was my favorite part. Our neighbor is a biologist and Henry thought he might be able to examine the specimen. He started to write the note and had me finish it. It reads: "To Brian, From Henry. Please take to lab. If your lab doesn't deal with Big Foot evidence, please return to me and I will send to New York University. Thank you."<br />
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The neighbors got a huge kick out of this. Brian did return the specimen noting that his lab generally deals with really tiny things, not big ones.<br />
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The project has also involved a lot of writing and drawing. Below is his recording of what he planned to do. "We spotted a big hairy animal. What was it? We will send it to Jack. Signed Monster Quest Member, Henry." (Jack is his best buddy.)<br />
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He happened to have captured a picture of the creature on a hidden camera.</div>
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This is the unknown specimen. (Potentially Big Foot)</div>
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He then compared the unknown specimen to known primates with similar characteristics.<br />
Could it have been a gorilla?</div>
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Perhaps it was a baboon?</div>
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Or maybe an orangutan?</div>
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Or not a primate at all, but a bear?</div>
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He determined that it most closely resembled an orangutan but that we could not rule out the possibility that he did in fact discover a new species.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-30196434199349042542012-05-31T18:06:00.000-06:002012-05-31T18:09:59.702-06:00Summer VacationSummer vacation officially started this week for all of the kids on our block. Since we basically unschool, the school calendar means little to us. But having the neighborhood kids home has certainly changed our days.<br />
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We are so very blessed to live on a block with a bunch of really great kids ranging from 13 on down to 17 months. These kids shatter all of our self-righteous homeschool stereotypes about public school kids. They're creative, kind, they know how to play with kids of all ages. They're really great kids. And, also shattering stereotypes, they're not over scheduled. With the exception of the one family with two parents working full time, the kids are home pretty much all day every day. And they play outside pretty much all day every day.<br />
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My kids run out the door after breakfast and I have to drag them in kicking and screaming for lunch and then again for dinner. It's awesome.<br />
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The kids are basically running their own summer camp. Today's mission was to catch a garden snake. As far as I know, they didn't actually make the catch, but they sure have had a lot of fun in the pursuit.<br />
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The other evening as I was making dinner I looked out my window and saw all 12 of the block's kids playing in my backyard. A visiting grandma had wandered over to help supervise and as it got closer to dinner a few moms showed up chat and collect their children.<br />
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I love all of this. I do. But I have to admit, I kind of miss my kids! Especially my oldest. He's so darn self sufficient now at the ripe old age of 7, that I hardly see him at all. He did come in with a splinter today. That was a nice way to make me feel needed.<br />
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It gives me such hope when I look and see these kids playing and interacting the way they do. I see that it is possible for kids to be schooled in a variety of ways and come out great. I see that "kids these days" are intelligent, creative, kind, and respectful.<br />
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On the other hand, it makes me that much more thankful for the closeness that homeschool provides. I can't imagine what I'd be missing if my kids were away from me all day, every day, all year round.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-8478335779080477012012-05-19T13:38:00.001-06:002012-05-19T13:38:18.278-06:00Montessori at Home: Spice Smelling<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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When my oldest, now 7, was a baby, I was very excited about creating a Montessori atmosphere in my home. I love Montessori's philosophy and the beauty of Montessori materials. But at some point I realized that what many of Montessori's "practical life" and "sensory" activities are trying to replicate occur quite naturally in the home. Maria Montessori was working with institutionalized children who did not have the luxury of the rich learning environments found naturally in today's middle class American homes.<br />
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There's nothing wrong with creating Montessori materials for your home, but if you're short on time, trays, and baskets, don't feel like you're cheating your child. Just open your spice cabinet.<br />
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My 17 month old and I spent about 25 minutes smelling spices this morning.<br />
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Nice fine motor component - taking off the lid. </div>
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Mmmmmm. . . red pepper flakes</div>
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Mmmmm. . . rosemary</div>
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Putting the lid back on.</div>
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Here, Mom! You smell.</div>
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Sad because he spilled spices on his toes and he doesn't like the mess.</div>
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After a good 20 minutes he expanded the activity from smelling to dumping. He pulled out a measuring cup and started pouring spices into it. This is when I got tired of the activity. I wasn't in the mood to clean up a huge spice mess. Or to waste my spices. Plus I was tired of standing up. So we moved on.<br />
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Sometimes when I'm browsing Pinterest and all of the amazing mommy blogs, I start to feel like I should do more for my kids. My point in sharing this is to recognize the good stuff that happens spontaneously.<br />
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So tell me, what are some of your natural environment learning successes?<br />
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<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-36763575486056589292012-05-09T20:23:00.002-06:002012-05-09T20:24:06.016-06:00I may regret this . . .I may regret this, and it's certainly off topic for this blog, but with all the broohaha over gay marriage/civil unions both locally and nationally, and with all of the Facebook updates I see from my friends on both sides of the issue, I just feel like I need to voice my opinion on the issue somewhere.<br />
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And I'm probably going to upset everyone of you.<br />
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Here's the thing. I believe the Catholic Church's teachings on marriage and sexuality. I believe that sex is perhaps God's most powerful gift to us. Through this intimate act of love we can join with God and actually be a part of the creation of an immortal soul. That's mind blowing really. What else can you do that results in the creation of something that will last for all of eternity? Because of the power of this act, God has asked us to observe guidelines regarding it's use. There's tons of stuff on the internet about this, if you care to read more, but I'm not here to convince you. I really don't care whether you agree with me or the Church. You're not going to change my mind, and I'm not trying to change yours.<br />
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Okay, so I take the very unpopular view that engaging in homosexual acts is a sin. Mind you I also believe that contraception and co-habiting are sins. Lots of things are sins. I commit sins every day. I don't think there's anything special about your sins or my sins. We're all sinners. All sin is bad. Again, unpopular views, but I'm just saying what I believe in case anyone cares. Which you probably don't. Which is fine.<br />
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But here's the thing. I really, really don't understand why my fellow Catholics are all up in a tizzy about the legal status of "gay marriage." I keep getting emails and Facebook messages about the armageddon-esque horrors about to be inflicted on our state because of the civil unions bill. Because the thing is, the state doesn't define marriage. God does. I'm not married because I have a piece of paper from the state of Colorado. I'm married because I took vows in front of God pledging to stand by my man 'til death do us part. Frankly, I'm annoyed that the Church required us to get a marriage license from the state. Because the state has nothing to do with making us married.<br />
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When we bought our house, there was some confusion in the paperwork because the woman we were buying it from was married to a man who was not yet legally divorced from his previous wife. But he'd presented a "get" to his former wife which, according to Jewish law, ended the marriage and made them each free to remarry. I truly admired that this couple placed God's law above man's law in their affairs.<br />
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I don't see what harm it causes if two adults receive the benefits available to married couples. There are laws that allow non-married heterosexual couples living "in sin" to receive these benefits and I don't see my fellow Catholics up in arms over this horrible celebration of sin. And if the state suddenly recognizes gay marriage, it doesn't make those marriages any more valid than they currently are.<br />
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I'm truly embarrassed by all of the hysteria over the "homosexual agenda." It seems to me if half of this energy was put into something really important - like finding ways to prevent the slaughter of unborn children - we'd all be a lot better off.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-82297630671896332922012-01-07T20:36:00.001-07:002012-01-07T20:36:05.734-07:00Born to CookHenry has declared that he was born to cook. Today he decided to bake a cake. He didn't ask for permission, he just went for it while unsupervised. Ryan "caught" him as he finished the batter and prepared to bake it. So Ryan helped him pour it in a pan and bake it.<br />
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The mess wasn't that bad. And he did help me clean it up.</div>
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The cake came out surprisingly well. And was pretty tasty, if not terribly sweet.</div>
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Because I'm always looking for an opportunity to get him to write, </div>
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I asked him to write down the recipe.</div>
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I guess he's been paying attention when I bake!</div>
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<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-20208484008210370872011-11-12T21:30:00.001-07:002011-11-12T21:50:25.902-07:00So apparently I haven't been blogging much! I blame a broken camera. But I bought a new one so maybe I'll update more often.<br />
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My kids have been up to some interesting stuff. Really interesting stuff. Like self designed experiments in which they come to the conclusion that the only way to kill a zombie is to crush his brain. Here is Henry with his cup of zombie brains.<br />
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Helen's experiment was about rotten eggs. Apparently if you leave eggs out for weeks they become really stinky.<br />
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Henry has also developed a deep interest in Ancient Greece. I believe it was sparked by our new routine of picking up Little Caesar's Pizza after his enrichment program on Tuesdays. He really likes the costumes of the period.<br />
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Here he is as "A Greek."<br />
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Here he is as a Greek sculptor working on a "huge statue." That's an olive leaf wreath on his head. He designed it himself.<br />
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Here is his "Acropolis"<br />
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Here are the Olympians wrestling. The women have been kicked out since they weren't allowed to watch the original games. But he did later decide those rules were stupid and let them join in.<br />
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I don't have any pictures of him dressed as Zeus hurling lightning bolts at Athens. </div>
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It's occurred to me while watching Henry do this self-directed unit study that "self-directed" really, truly, is the key to learning this sort of stuff. I never told him to build an acropolis out of blocks. I never suggested he might use his tinker toys as lightning bolts or to create Poseidon's trident.<br />
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I remember being asked to do such things in school in an effort to make the learning "meaningful" and "hands on." But it wasn't "meaningful" because I usually didn't care too much about what we were learning about. Which sucks because now, I wish I'd learned more. I don't wish that I'd "paid more attention in school," I wish that I'd retained more. I think Henry will retain a lot more about Ancient Greece than I ever did simply because he's learning about it at a point when he asked to learn about it. And he's learning it in a way that is truly meaningful for him because he's designing the learning tasks. Another kid might want to do detailed drawings of an acropolis or write stories about the gods. I love that my kids have the freedom to learn in ways that work for them.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-34046351225459409292011-09-17T16:21:00.000-06:002011-09-17T16:22:57.189-06:00Celtic Harvest FestivalWe decided to head out for a little family fun today. I highly recommend the <a href="http://www.celticharvestfestivaledgewater.com/">Edgewater Celtic Harvest Festival</a> to those in the area with small kids. It was really, really low key and fun. And the only thing we paid for was $1/person for the sword play.<br />
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This kid was mean. I had to intervene and tell him to stop jabbing Henry in the crotch. </div>
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Not sure where his parents were!</div>
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My leprechaun!</div>
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Watching hurling. Or some other Irish ball and stick sport. I told you it was a chill festival.</div>
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Kids playing bagpipes and drums. Very cool.</div>
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Cutest baby ever.</div>
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So we were watching a puppet show which, honestly, I was a little bored with. In another area they had started up a little Irish weapon demo and I suggested Henry might prefer to watch that. I should have known better. He was way into the puppet show. Here he is, balloon sword drawn, ready to face the evil Nick-a-Brick. He moved behind his daddy before a bit of protection before drawing his sword.</div>
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They had a lovely little arts and crafts area where Helen enjoyed painting </div>
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blarney stones and popsicle sticks.</div>
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Here's part of the weapon demonstration. We were able to catch the end of it.</div>
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Henry and Ryan are currently in the back yard running at each other with swords and shouting "huzzah!" We'll definitely be going back next year!</div>
<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-30020532047540166052011-09-15T13:07:00.001-06:002011-09-15T13:07:09.128-06:00So we've been "back to school" for a couple of weeks now. And our life doesn't look any different than it did before we "started school." Except the neighborhood kids aren't as available for playing. Which means I've had to suck it up and engage in some light saber fights. (When I'm feeling schooly, I call this physical education.)<br />
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We've started our Five in a Row curriculum. The first week we read the book 3, maybe 4 times. The second week the kids revolted, I got angry, and we read two pages of the book one time. I decided it wasn't worth it to push, so we just let it go. This week, we read the book once on Monday and we read half of it in the waiting room at the doctor's office this morning. We're having a book themed dinner tonight, but that's really the extent of our activities.<br />
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Henry is obsessed with Star Wars/Clone Wars at the moment, and I'm going with it, but I must admit to some discomfort on my part.<br />
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I feel like I should be doing more. He's making progress in his reading. He's starting to read signs and stuff. I don't know what he's reading in books, because he's not sharing that with me. I don't have the first clue where his mat skills stand at the moment, except that he's developed a new interest in money because he wants to safe up for a rifle so he can complete his Davey Crockett costume.<br />
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I guess I need to read some more John Holt or something. Honestly, many of the unschooling blogs leave me cold. And yet I'm seeing some of the same things play out in my own home. I'm raising a Star Wars obsessed kid whose greatest skill is his agility with a light saber.<br />
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Help me find some perspective.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-75912377912279593342011-09-08T15:05:00.000-06:002011-09-08T15:57:34.478-06:00Happy Birthday, Mary!<div>
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Today the Church celebrates the <a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/10712b.htm">Nativity of the Blessed Virgin Mary</a>. Last year we made a cake for Mary, and Helen still talks about it. So this year we threw a birthday party with some friends.<br />
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The kids wanted to make a red cake and decorate it with roses. Our roses were inspired by <a href="http://catholicicing.blogspot.com/2011/02/rice-krispie-treat-grotto-for-our-lady.html">Lacy's awesomeness</a> over at Catholic Icing. I'm not sure how Lacy got hers to look so cute. But the kids had fun making them anyway.</div>
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We decorated the dining room with our various Marian icons and statues, and had our friends bring their own to add.</div>
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Henry spent much of the morning running around involved in sword play, and in an effort to tie his play to the feast day, I told him about the<a href="http://www.sevensorrows.com/explanation.htm"> Seven Sorrows of Mary</a> and showed him this picture:</div>
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Helen then decorated the picture and hung it on the wall as part of our decorations. And Henry created his own drawing to add. That's Jesus in the middle on top and Mary on his right and Joseph on his left.</div>
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Then he added his own depiction of the Trinity:</div>
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How cute is this little guy? He looooooves Mary!</div>
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Notice the gorgeous statues of Our Lady of Guadalupe and Our Lady of Le Leche. </div>
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I didn't get any pictures of the primary party games. The girls played house and the boys were engaged in light saber fights in the back yard. What? Don't you have light saber fights at your Marian feast celebrations? </div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Happy Birthday, Mary!! </span></div>
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Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-5521288873867333552011-09-04T17:09:00.000-06:002011-09-04T17:14:29.071-06:00Zone of Proximal Development Part 2: The ZPD and Learning to WriteIn my <a href="http://mylittlehouseinthecity.blogspot.com/2011/09/zone-of-proximal-development-when-to.html">last post</a> I explained a bit about what the ZPD and scaffolding are and what scaffolding looks like when "teaching" babies how to roll over. In this post, I'll provide a couple of examples of scaffolding the writing process.<br />
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I'd like to start by pointing out that writing is not a single skill, but rather a number of skills that come together into a finished product. In order to write, say, a thank you note that you would like your friend to read, you must 1) conceive of the idea of writing the note, 2) choose the words you need to express your gratitude, 3) decide which letters are in the words you want to write, 4) form the letters on the page, 5) plan ahead so you don't run out of room and 6) put the words in order. I'm sure I could think of more skills involved, but we'll leave it at that.</div>
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So that's at least 6 things your child is doing if he's trying to write something on a piece of paper. It's a big task.<br />
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The first trick to scaffolding is identifying when your child is on the verge of moving up the skill ladder and determining what kind of support he needs to make that step. The next trick to scaffolding is recognizing when your child needs to just hang out and get comfortable on the rung he's on before trying to make the next step.<br />
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For example, my son has <a href="http://mylittlehouseinthecity.blogspot.com/2011/08/how-my-son-became-writer.html">recently learned to write</a>. If you check the list above, he's pretty good at steps 1 through 4. Steps 5 and 6 are still a struggle for him. Frequently throughout our day he will bring me something he has written and ask me to read it. He still writes pretty big. He hasn't developed the fine motor skills he needs to neatly form tiny letters on the page. So he can fit two, maybe three words neatly on a page before he runs out of room. At this point, he just starts putting the letters for the words anywhere they might fit on the page. The result is something like this:<br />
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Which is fine if you have some context (that's a drawing of Abraham Lincoln), and there's only one word climbing up the page. But when the message is longer, it becomes a huge mess:<br />
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I have no idea what those say, though I do spot the word "the" in the second picture.<br />
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One day, feeling a bit frustrated, I told him that you have to write from top to bottom and left to right or people can't read it and it doesn't make sense. I wanted to show him. I wanted to have him rewrite what he'd written. He wanted to punch me in the nose.<br />
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I really should have kept my mouth shut in that situation. I wasn't scaffolding, I was pushing. He's not ready to move to the next step. He's still getting comfortable with steps 1 through 4. The effect of my "help" was to make him feel incompetent and angry. I shut down all learning opportunities at that moment and replaced them with a flood of frustrated tears.<br />
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So there's a great example of what not to do. But every once in a while my instincts are better.<br />
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My little girl is also learning to write. She's not really "writing" as defined in the 6 step process above; she's pretty much just forming letters on the page. Her fine motor skills are more mature than her brother's and she is able to form letters quite small and neatly. She doesn't know all of her letters, but she is very interested in writing her name and has picked up that "H" is the first letter of her name.<br />
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Helen had been writing "her name" for several weeks. Here's an example:<br />
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Note that I am aware that you do not spell "Helen" HOI. But I hadn't said anything to her about it. She'd tells me she'd written her name and I'd say, "wonderful!"<br />
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She kept practicing and made the following progression:<br />
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Note that she is practicing. She's doing the same thing over and over. Not because I told her to. Not because she has a worksheet to complete. She's doing it because writing her name is important to her right now. Also note that up to this point, I hadn't given her any instruction on writing her name. We'd talked about how Henry and Helen both start with H. We'd pointed out H's. Everything else she'd picked up just from living our daily lives.</div>
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Then one day she was no longer satisfied with the progress she was making on her own. We were at the library and while I was showing Henry how to find books using the computer, Helen requested her own scrap of paper and teeny golf pencil from the basket by the computer. She then pouted, "I don't know how to write my name." I asked, "Do you want me to show you?" She nodded. So I wrote her name on the piece of paper and she copied it. She has been practicing her name, again without prompting, for several days now and it now looks like this:<br />
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So in this case, the scaffolding I provided was a model for her to copy. Note that it still isn't quite right. But it's a lot closer than HOI. The letters aren't in the right order, the "L" is backwards, and there's no "N" at all (probably because she doesn't feel up for tackling that diagonal line), but the model I gave her bumped her up to a new level of competence. My job now is to stand back and let her get comfortable at this level until she's ready for my help to move up the next rung of the ladder.<br />
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How will I know she's ready? More than likely it will be because she asks me. If I felt I just couldn't hold back, I could ask her if she wants to learn to draw an "N." Because I know she's capable of tracing small letters on a page, I could print a handwriting worksheet for her and show her how to do it. But if I did that, I would be careful to present in a pretty nonchalant way. "Hey Helen! I put a worksheet on your writing table that shows you how to write the letter 'N.'" And leave it at that. If she asked for help with it I would help her. If she ignored it, I wouldn't bring it up again. I'd just leave it there.<br />
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The essence of scaffolding is waiting until a child is super ready to take the next step and offering just enough assistance to get him there. It's holding a child's hand as she jumps across a little stream. As opposed to pushing her across a river in a canoe. Either way she'll reach the other side, but if she makes the leap herself, the experience will be much more rewarding.</div>
Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-7188478340560607032011-09-03T15:58:00.001-06:002011-09-04T17:19:18.020-06:00The Zone of Proximal Development: When to Push, When to Hold BackRecently in my homeschool circles, there has been much discussion of when it might be appropriate to push/encourage/nudge our children. How can we discern whether a little encouragement or guidance from us will help them jump to the next level of competence, or push them over the edge of frustration?<br />
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Lev Vygotsky, the great educational theorist, posited that there exists what he called the Zone of Proximal Development, or ZPD in the educational jargon. Vygotsky believed that the ZPD is where the greatest learning occurrs. The ZPD is that area of competence just beyond a person's current level of achievement - a level that one can reach with just a bit of the right help. He called this help "scaffolding."<br />
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Scaffolding is something we all do more or less naturally with babies. Imagine playing on the floor with a baby who is lying on his back and rolling to his side. He's just about to roll over. He's almost got it. He just needs a liiiitle encouragement. You hold out a favorite toy just beyond his reach. He reeeeaches for the toy and - woop!- he rolls over. Yay! You've just scaffolded rolling over for the baby.<br />
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Now notice, if that baby was not yet reaching for toys, or was not yet capable of getting most of the way over on his own, or wasn't interested in rolling or reaching at that moment, your efforts would have been fruitless.<br />
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Again, this comes naturally for most of us when we're working with babies. But it is much less intuitive when we're working with older children. With older children who have more or less mastered the art of walking and talking, we tend to push a little harder. If a 5 year old can't write his name, we may feel compelled to put a pen in his hand and use our hand over his hand to walk him through the steps. This isn't scaffolding. I'm not sure what I would call it, but it isn't scaffolding.<br />
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Our tendency to want to push to this extent comes in large part from a system of schooling that has tricked us into thinking that all kids need to learn the same skills at the same time and at the same rate in order to be at "grade level." If a 5 year old can't write his name, he is "behind" and we must push him to "catch up."<br />
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Nah. The problem with this kind of pushing is that it makes learning harder than it has to be. I could start coaching a baby on rolling over from the day he comes home from the hospital, but he's probably not going to roll over any sooner than if I'd just waited until he was ready. But in the mean time, I may make him think that this rolling over business is a lot of stupid hard work that he's not really interested in doing.<br />
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Okay. So what does scaffolding look like beyond the babyhood? A big question that keeps popping up in my circles, and one I've written about before, is teaching writing. I'm not sure why we're so preoccupied with writing, but it seems that we are. So in <a href="http://mylittlehouseinthecity.blogspot.com/2011/09/zone-of-proximal-development-part-2-zpd.html">my next post</a> I will look at what scaffolding looks like when teaching a kid to write.<br />
<br />Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-14858225873258535772011-08-24T17:55:00.003-06:002011-08-30T07:51:48.675-06:00Dreaming of TimelinesOne of the biggest "gaps" in my own education is in my understanding of history. It was never presented to me in a way that I could wrap my brain around. I still struggle with seeing the big picture. So I've become obsessed with creating a big picture of history. Literally. I want to make a wall timeline.<br />
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At first I envisioned something like this:<br />
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Isn't that cool? I've been racking my brain for where in the world to put something like this in my house. I even found a lovely <a href="http://www.guesthollow.com/homeschool/history/timeline.html">free printable timeline</a> at a fellow homeschooler's site, <a href="http://www.guesthollow.com/index.html">GuestHollow.com</a>. Just the A.D. part of it is 70 pages. I did the math. I would need about 50 linear feet of wall space. I don't have that.<br />
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The Guest Hollow timeline is meant to be put in a notebook. It's awesome for that. Notebook timelines are great, but my brain needs to see the big picture. The whole picture. All at once.<br />
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So then I came across this:<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1143/1462476518_dbd7bbbbbe_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1143/1462476518_dbd7bbbbbe_o.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><br />
It goes up one side for the years before Christ, and then comes back down the other side for the years Anno Domini. The one pictured above came from <a href="http://www.squidoo.com/homeschooltimelines">this</a> squidoo page. It's published by Konos and comes with the printed pictures.<br />
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This is perfect. This gives the big picture. Of course, I'm not willing to shell out the cash for the premade timeline. And I'm not terribly interested in what someone else thinks I should put on the timeline. So I'm going to make my own. Other people have done it.<br />
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Here's one from <a href="http://kindredblessings.blogspot.com/2008/08/our-wall-timeline-today.html">Kindred Blessings</a>.<br />
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Here's one from <a href="http://www.homeschoolinthewoods.com/HTTA/TimelineHelps/">Homeschool in the Woods</a>:<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KSHZ6iLSAG8/Sqlruh6M3PI/AAAAAAAAAWo/aP3K6Mau7eg/s1600-h/wall+timeline.jpg">Here's</a> a pretty amazing one from <a href="http://peacecreekontheprairie.com/large-families/large-family-homeschool-history-lessons-family-school-style">Peace Creek on the Prairie</a>.<br />
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And a really neat one from <a href="http://higherupandfurtherin.blogspot.com/2006/12/our-historical-wall-timeline.html">Higher Up and Further In</a>.<br />
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And here's a really great <a href="http://www.knowledgequestmaps.com/article2.htm">how to</a> with specifics for spacing and such.<br />
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Lots of ideas. I'm still trying to figure out exactly how we'll do ours.<br />
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But I do know where we'll put it. The only wall in the house that can accommodate such a monstrosity is in our dining room. The wall has been blank for the two years since we moved into the house because I've been waiting to discover the perfect display for it. I was thinking of a brightly colored still life. A giant cluttered timeline wasn't really what I had in mind.<br />
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Which brings me to a whole new issue. When you put one of these bad boys in your home you are declaring, loud and proud, we are homeschooling geeks. Our house is for living and learning. It will never <i>ever</i> be featured in <i>Better Homes and Gardens</i>. I'm okay with that. Mostly. I can almost guarantee that through the years this timeline will provide much more fodder for dinner conversation than a depiction of flowers in a vase. No matter how lovely those flowers might be. But a fairly large part of me longs for a tastefully decorated house.<br />
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But, I think I'm willing to sacrifice that for what I think a timeline like this can do for our family. Living with this timeline will give my children the opportunity to document what they learn through the years. It will help them revisit what they've learned each time they add to the timeline, and see how things all fit together. They'll be able to see that while the United States was busy fighting the Civil War, Franz Shubert was premiering a new symphony.<br />
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They'll be able to see how the Saints and the history of the Church fit into the rest of world history. Their knowledge of history will build on itself and will be constantly reviewed so that they will really know history. It's something I've always wanted for myself. So this ugly timeline will be a gift to me and to my children.<br />
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I'll post pictures when I get it up.<br />
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Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-11870686371391354902011-08-21T14:18:00.004-06:002011-08-24T11:00:20.709-06:00Semester Book PlanI did it. Last night I spent a few hours working out our semester long plan for Five in a Row. I have a hard time doing this. I have a hard time picking a book for one week, let alone several months. I want everything to be perfect. And then I get into this idea that everything we do that week has to tie into the book and that I need to tie it into the various Holy Days and Feast Days that are happening and I get overwhelmed and decide since it can't be perfect I'm not doing it at all. I push past that feeling and then comes the feeling that the whole exercise is futile because my kids aren't going to be interested in doing any of this anyway. And then I push past that feeling and try to clarify why it is I'm doing Five in a Row at all.<br />
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This is what I've come up with. I'm doing Five in a Row because I want some starting point for sharing the things I want to share with my children. I want something to motivate me to get off my butt and interact with my kids. Maybe it's the leftover "schooling" in me, but, what can I say, I loved school. I was a student for the first 25 years of my life and then I was a teacher. I have school in my blood. So, for better or worse, I haven't been completely deschooled and I feel I need some sort of something to organize stuff around. At least for now.<br />
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One of the tenets of unschooling is to introduce children to a wide variety of topics so that they can discover their own personal interests and passions. Five in a Row gives me a gentle but systematic way of doing this. It was through a Five in a Row study last year that I learned how fascinated I am by the history of flight. I'm hoping we'll discover more new interests and passions this year.<br />
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So here's my plan for the first part of the year. I'm putting this up here in case someone reading this wants to play along with us either on a regular basis or just occasionally. I plan to do a field trip on Thursdays that ties in with the book/unit for the week. It'd be fun to have other families join us who were working on the same thing.<br />
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We're starting the last week of August, the 29th, with Andy and the Lion. We'll also read <a href="http://www.amazon.com/St-Jerome-Lion-Margaret-Hodges/dp/0531059383">St. Jerome and the Lion</a>. After that:<br />
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<b>September</b><br />
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<ol><li>Mary the Mother of Jesus by Tomie dePaola. The Feast of the Nativity of Mary is on the 8th so we'll be taking a quick break from Five in a Row. However, it will still feel very FIAR as Tomie de Paola writes amazing children's literature.</li>
<li>Down Down the Mountain</li>
<li>Papa Piccolo</li>
<li>Lentil</li>
</ol><div><b>October</b></div><div><ol><li>Henry the Castaway</li>
<li>The Tale of Peter Rabbit (with a <a href="http://coloradosymphony.org/learn/petite-musique/">field trip</a> Monday to see the CSO perform a musical version of the story!)</li>
<li>Madeline</li>
<li>Halloween (That's not a book title, it's a holiday. And it's a big one around here, so we'll just read our favorite Halloween titles.)</li>
</ol><div><b>November</b></div></div><div><ol><li>The Giraffe that Walked to Paris. This might get pre-empted as Halloween happens on Monday of this week and All Saints' Day and All Souls' Day are big around here as well. We may just give into the festivities.</li>
<li>Another Celebrated Dancing Bear</li>
<li>Babar to Duet or not to Duet. We'll be attending a special field trip this week to see a symphony. It's on a Tuesday. I'm trying to get our enrichment program to do it as a field trip since it's on our enrichment program day. But if not, we'll skip school and go anyway.</li>
<li>Cranberry Thanksgiving</li>
</ol><div><b>December</b></div></div><div>For December/Advent, we'll be doing <a href="http://www.elizabethfoss.com/reallearning/">Elizabeth Foss</a>'s <a href="http://ebeth.typepad.com/reallearning/advent-and-christmas-with.html">Advent and Christmas with Tomie de Paola</a> unit study. I'm very excited about this. The books we'll read will be:</div><div><ol><li>Merry Christmas Strega Nona</li>
<li>Country Angel Christmas</li>
<li>The Lady of Guadalupe</li>
<li>The Legend of the Poinsettia</li>
<li>The Clown of God</li>
<li>Jingle the Christmas Clown</li>
<li>The Story of the Three Wise Kings</li>
<li>The Legend of Old Befana</li>
</ol><div><b>January</b></div></div><div>So that I wouldn't lose steam after the holidays, I went ahead and planned through January. After we finish up the Epiphany celebrations (which around here includes making tamales, so Tomie dePaola will fit right in!), we'll continue as follows:</div><div><ol><li>Katy and the Big Snow</li>
<li>Amber of the Mountain</li>
<li>Salamander Room</li>
</ol><div>So there you have it. I know it doesn't seem like a big deal to pick out a few books, but it always exhausts me. It's hard to know what the kids will find appealing. I'm hoping these titles work out well for us. If not, we'll just drop them and try again the following week!</div></div><br />
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Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-7544236419034740412011-08-09T12:49:00.001-06:002011-08-09T12:56:12.203-06:00"Back to School" Anxiety<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0a10uUwCutw/TkGCZ3sWuYI/AAAAAAAAAIk/ZyZo78ATz2I/s1600/1stdayschool.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0a10uUwCutw/TkGCZ3sWuYI/AAAAAAAAAIk/ZyZo78ATz2I/s400/1stdayschool.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>Not sure if it's the slight cooling of the days, the garden harvest, the back to school sales everywhere or the fact that Henry returns to his enrichment program in a couple of weeks, but I'm starting to feel some anxiety about this coming homeschool year.<br />
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I'm sure we'll find our rhythm. I know I will continue to see my children learn and grow. But I am at a point, once again, where I feel like I should be taking a more active role in the process. Part of this is because I want to. But then I start thinking of all of the cool things we could be doing and know that we can never do it all and then feel overwhelmed by everything and then I'm frozen by my anxiety and I just do nothing. It's such a lovely cycle.<br />
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So I've worked out a weekly routine. And I've set an intention of doing math and phonics every day. I am really resisting using the curriculum we have for these areas of learning, but I'm going to try to do it consistently for a month and see how it works for us. I resist "drill and kill" or any sort of scope and sequence type learning, but then I use the analogy of a musician practicing scales and it starts to make more sense to me. I think Henry needs the repeated practice provided by things like phonics flash cards to build his fluency for reading. Or maybe he doesn't, but I'll admit I'm uneasy waiting until he's 10 to see if he just becomes a good reader on his own.<br />
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Well, I allotted the kids one episode of Hello Kitty and that is over, so my time for thinking and writing is also over.<br />
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What anxieties, if any, are you facing as the rest of the world heads back to school?Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-18582930347168092882011-08-06T15:15:00.000-06:002011-08-06T15:15:06.897-06:00How my son became a writerWhen Henry started kindergarten last year, he showed absolutely no interest in handwriting. None. He failed every fine motor screening at his well child checks from the time he was two. At 5, as far as I knew, as far as he would demonstrate to me, he could not even draw a straight, vertical line.<br />
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I alternated between freaking out and searching for occupational therapists that accept our insurance, and telling myself it would come in time. I considered not only purchasing Handwriting Without Tears, but taking the full training so I would really know how to implement it. I used all of the tricks in my bag to entice him to develop his writing skills. I listened to advice from people who know less than I do on the matter. I listened hard to the tiny little voice in me that said, "he's fine. He just needs time."<br />
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On his first day of classes at his homeschool enrichment program, he came home with a paper that he'd written his name on. Not a scribble. Much more than a straight, vertical line. Five letters, that I could read: H-E-N-R-Y. Huh. Little stinker. Apparently he was capable of much more than I even knew.<br />
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That fact tormented me for a while. What else does he know that I don't know he knows? Is he not showing his skills because he's a perfectionist? Is he bored? And, of course, what have I done wrong? Why will he write for these strangers at school and not for me?<br />
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But again, I managed to hear the tiny little voice that said, "he's fine. You're fine. Everything will be fine."<br />
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When I asked Henry who had written his name, he said, "I did." I asked him, "who taught you how to write your name?"He answered, "you did." Really? Huh.<br />
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So although it had been established that he could, in fact, write actual letters on paper, Henry was still loathe to put pen - or crayon, or pen, or paintbrush, or even a finger loaded with paint - to paper. I didn't push it. I just made materials available and left it be.<br />
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Throughout the year he experimented more and more, but it never became his favorite thing to do. And then, one day, it happened. We had a Very Bad Day. It was the kind of day that makes you hang your head as a mother and wonder 1) how could I have produced such a rotten kid and 2) how can I look at these events and bring some growth out of them.<br />
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I'll spare you the details of his transgressions. What's important to this story is that on this Very Bad Day, Henry had to give up his TV time to write three apology letters.<br />
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It was brutal. It was excruciating. It took him a whole hour to write three letters that averaged about 10 words each. And they were pretty much illegible. I was embarrassed as we presented these tortured writings to their recipients. I feared the judgment of my failure as a homeschooling mom to teach my son to write.<br />
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I was still in a funk from the events of the Very Bad Day when my husband returned from work. He cheerfully asked Henry, "how was your day?" Henry's response? "Great! I learned how to write all by myself!"<br />
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I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.<br />
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From that time, Henry has become quite the writer. He makes signs, labels pictures, and writes letters. He's also started drawing pictures, which he'd never really done before.<br />
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So there you have it. While no expert I know would ever recommend that the way to encourage a reluctant writer is to force him to write letters of apology, that is, in fact, what worked in our family. Your mileage may vary.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6141373801101794883.post-15867034696980106712011-07-26T20:04:00.000-06:002011-07-26T20:04:26.801-06:00Watching your children grow up is a strange thing. Just six years ago I became a mother when I gave birth to this beautiful bundle of baby boy. I was terrified and elated. And six years later I still experience those conflicting emotions on a daily basis.<br />
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He's no longer a beautiful bundle of baby boy. He's up to my chest and long and lean. Though he is still breathtakingly beautiful.<br />
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When he was a tiny baby his inner workings were a mystery to me. I did my best to guess when he was hungry or tired. Looking back through the lens of experience I now realize that as often as he was hungry or tired he might have been frustrated or bored.<br />
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He's always been a very curious boy. And a very thoughtful boy. Strangers commented on his pensive gaze, what was often labeled "seriousness," almost as often as they commented on his striking beauty. One friendly soul remarked that once he started talking I'd be in for it. "He's storing up all the questions he can't yet ask." I believe she was right.<br />
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When he started talking at a year old he did so with a perfection not often seen in such tiny children. By the time he was three, he sounded like a 10 year old. The only two words that he has ever mispronounced were "cholocolate" and "dubya-lu." He still says "dubya-lu" and it melts my heart every time.<br />
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He spoke clearly and often. He still has a lot to say. But what is sometimes maddening is that, just as when he was a tiny baby, I still don't always know what he's thinking. He's still a deep thinker. But he doesn't always choose to share those thoughts with me.<br />
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It's tough as a mother. I want to know all that goes on inside his little brain. I want to know his hopes and fears, his dreams and worries. It is distressing to me that he doesn't pour his heart out to me. If something is bothering him, he wants me close. He wants my physical presence, but he doesn't want to talk. Maybe this is a Mars/Venus thing. Maybe it's an introvert thing. I don't know. But I have to stop myself at times from bullying him into telling me what he's thinking.<br />
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The hardest part is knowing that the older he gets, the less I will know him. For now I have ways of getting information from others. But I won't always be able to ask his friend's mom to get the story from her child. I will have to trust in our relationship enough to know that he will open up to me if and when he needs to. That he will know that I am always there and willing to listen.Jessicahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04561934953783630792noreply@blogger.com3